The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
