Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
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