508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize