i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
