All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
