I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
