she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
