but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
