The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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