More tranny stories later!
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
