Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
