By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
