your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
