also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
