We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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