So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
