Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
We are all done wearing pants today
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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