we need to drink 2009 down the drain
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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