talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
