Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
