I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
