Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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