she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
