I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
My bed smells like the plague
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
