Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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