I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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