Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize