Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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