question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Boobs are out for the taking
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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