so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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