Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
