Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
