i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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