This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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