just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
