when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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