the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
