Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
accomplished twins. life is a go
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
