I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize
