I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
