I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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