oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
