Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
