who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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