: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
