TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
