So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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