I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
