I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
