I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize